BUD & LOU AND BAD BREATH TOO:  THE CLASSIC TEAM RULES ON THE COLGATE COMEDY HOUR

If you’re an Abbott & Costello fan (and if you’re not – WHY not?!), then you’ve undoubtedly added The Universal Complete Movie Collection to your library – as well as the magnificent Passport Video dual boxes of their entire neo-realist early 50s TV show.  Hey – if you’ve got those, you’re pretty much set…That said, any A & C addict must have everything – so, no brainer, you’re going to want to have Infinity Entertainment’s new 6-disc entry, LEGENDS OF LAUGHTER: ABBOTT & COSTELLO.

The team, as you know, aced the media in the 1940s and 50s – triumphantly trumping the movies, radio and television; thus, this box is an ambitious little mutha – covering all the bases (and that means numerous renditions of “Who’s On First”).  Yeah, there are scads of theatrical trailers, and 17 radio episodes from their bizarre series (with such uncharacteristic guests as Marlene Dietrich , Charles Laughton and Errol Flynn).  Plus there are two complete features – the PD regulars Africa Screams (1949) and Jack and the Beanstalk (1952).  Then there are the infamous bloopers…and WWII war bond-raising shorts produced by the Armed Forces.  Pretty cool – except that all of this stuff has been readily available in various incarnations for eons.  OK – so its nice to have all of this in one convenient container – but…the NBC/ABC series can be gotten in more complete versions from Radio Spirits…and the features exist in better transfers elsewhere…and the enticing movie and TV bloopers are simply the same old Universal outtakes which buffs have been watching on 16mm and video tapes for over 35 years; weirdly enough, the bloopers encompass the rarer In Society, Here Come the Co-Eds and It Ain’t Hay faux pas, but eschew the crème de la crème Abbott & Costello Meet Frankenstein gems.  Although heralded on the packaging as “movie and TV bloopers” – these are strictly the Universal reels – with no television boo-boos on display.  Of course, to paraphrase Addison DeWitt in All About Eve, that’s all live TV of the early 50s was – bloopers…and, in this mindset, viewers won’t be disappointed by the deceptive sales hyperbole.  For when all is said and done, it’s the 14 kinescoped episodes of The Colgate Comedy Hour that makes this DVD compilation a “gotta have.”  Cues are missed, Lou’s pratfalls knock down the wafer-thin flats, lines get flubbed – and ad-libs fly with more abandon than bullets on a Dick Cheney weekend hunting excursion.  The quality of the kines is remarkably good – and, let’s face it, it’s a chance to see one of the greatest comedy acts of all time as close to “in person” as you’ll ever get.  It’s also a premier showcase for Bud Abbott’s genius.  Bud was, unquestionably, the best straight man in the history of the world – and, with a loose cannon (albeit an inspired one) like Lou Costello as a partner – he had his work cut out for him.  Watching him effortlessly rein in the rotund comic after he slams into and accidentally demolishes a  plywood set with the subtlety of a blacksmith’s mallet smashing a grape is indeed a thing of comic beauty to behold. 

I know these routines backwards and forwards – and even I was wondering if this piece of destruction could possibly have been pre-arranged (it wasn’t – just Bud being at the top of his game). The prize bloopers, however, are not on-screen, but on-box, courtesy of the uninformed Infinity Entertainment copywriting department.  In addition to the aforementioned jacket notes flub, the DVD menu betrays the classic movie/TV knowledge of the reckless video scribe assigned this job.  Lon Chaney, Jr. is listed as a guest on one of the Colgate Comedy Hours, but his appearance is incorrectly chapter stopped – revealing not the celebrated screen villain but ubiquitous character actor Milton Frome (who, in the context of the sketch – a military setting for Bud to pitch his USO show, is even introduced as Colonel Frome…).  Chaney does appear later on as the Frankenstein monster, sans dialogue or even grunt – a bit obviously done as a favor to the team.  When I think of the scores of unemployed entertainment writers/researchers who would love to sink their teeth into this kind of gig, it sends me blood a-boiling…then again, if life was fair Paris Hilton would have been vacationing in the desert during the Manhattan Project tests.  Suffice to say, we’re lucky these video transcriptions survived at all – and are here nearly 60 years later for our enjoyment and pleasure.  Ditto the plethora of gloriously politically incorrect Colgate TV commercials interspersed between the shows.  Particularly notable is a candid candida toothpaste spot where an attractive female is told by her rather blunt family dentist/shameless product pitchman that the reason her husband won’t touch her is because she basically reeks!  Suffice to say, that Colgate sexually patches up this potent impotency dilemma and, when we next see the lass and hubby, she’s happily shutting the front door on the concerned television audience grinning like the grill on a Studebaker –Eisnehower era proof positive that she’s gettin’ it big time!

-         Mel Neuhaus

LEGENDS OF LAUGHTER: ABBOTT & COSTELLO.  B&W; full frame [1.33:1]; single layer.  Infinity Entertainment.